He had a Colt .45 and a deck of cards
Stagger Lee

He wore rat-drawn shoes and an old Stetson hat
Had a '28 Ford, had payments on that
Stagger Lee

His woman threw him out in the ice and the snow
And told him, "Never ever come back no more"
Stagger Lee

So he walked though the rain an he walked through the mud
Till he came to a place called The Bucket Of Blood
Stagger Lee

He said, "Mr Motherfucker, you know who I am"
And the barkeeper said, "No, I don't give a good goddamn"
To Stagger Lee

He said, "Well bartender, it's plain to see
I'm that bad motherfucker called Stagger Lee"
Mr. Stagger Lee

Barkeep said, "Yeah, I've heard your name down the way
And I kick motherfucking asses like you everyday"
Mr Stagger Lee

Well, those were the last words that the barkeep said
'Cause Stag put four holes in his motherfucking head

Just then in came a broad called Nellie Brown
Was known to make more money than any bitch in town
She struts across the bar, hitching up her skirt
Over to Stagger Lee, she starts to flirt
With Stagger Lee

She saw the barkeep, said, "O God, he can't be dead!"
Stag said, "Well just count the holes in the motherfucker's head"

She said, "You look like you ain't scored in quite a time.
Why not come to my pad?  It won't cost you a dime"
Mr. Stagger Lee

"But there's something I have to say before you begin
You'll have to be gone before my man Billy Dilly comes in,
Stagger Lee"

"I'll stay here till Billy Dilly comes in, till time comes to pass
And furthermore I'll fuck Billy Dilly in his motherfucking ass"
Said Stagger Lee
"I'm a bad motherfucker, don't you know
But I'll crawl over fifty good pussies just to get one fat boy's asshole"
Said Stagger Lee

Just then Billy Dilly rolls in and said, "You must be
That bad motherfucker called Stagger Lee"
Stagger Lee

"Yeah, I'm Stagger Lee and you better get down on your knees
And suck my dick, because if you don't you're sure to be dead"
Said Stagger Lee

Billy Dilly dropped down and slobbered on his head
And Stag filled him full of lead
Oh yeah