Have you ever had an uninvited guest

Why did you wear sweatpants

The day she wore that dress

You put a book on it

Your woody wouldn't quit

Think of disgusting things

and don't encourage it

And then it starts to ache

zippers about to break

Your using every trick to try to tame your trouser snake

Listen and listen good

Don' t cover up your wood

A woody never should

Ever have to be Caged or blocked

Unlock your jock

Just let it pop Like a jack in the box

Show em that your willy works

A stiffy shouldn't have to hurt

Make em scream oh my god

As you shock em with your lightning rod

Baby let your mojo rise

It doesn't matter what the size

You don't have to feel ashamed

Like Miley it just can't be tamed

Boing boing boing

Even bigger than Boeing Boeing Boeing

Sometimes it can be annoying noying noying

But now your confidence is gro- ow-ing

Put your package on display

Even if they scream and run away

Your the jockey of your one eyed horse

I'm talking bout your dong of course

Someday when youíre old and bored

You'll wish that you had shown it more

It's the reason that the world was born

Every girl believes in unicorns

Doing ding dong

Someday random chubbys will be gone

Doing ding dong

Can't believe I wrote a whole schlong song