How to handle a woman,
There's a way said a wise old man,
A way known by every woman,
Since the whole rigmarole began!

Do I flatter her, I begged him answer,
Do I threaten or cajole or plea,
Do I brood or play the gay romancer?
Said he, smiling, "No, indeed!"

"How to handle a woman,
Mark me well, I will tell you sir!
The way to handle a woman,
Is to love her, simply love her,
Merely love her, love her,
Love her!"