The master playwright 

Urges you to play right/play wrong; 

Life is long and every night's the first night. 



The wardrobe mistress 

Urges you to dress left/dress right; 

What a mess when your underpants are too tight. 



Who's on the stage door 

To help you find the way in/way out? 

It's not a sin to be knowing that you don't know. 



When you breathe your last line 

Will you make your exit stage left/stage right? 

Well, you might decide while there's still time. 



You have an angel on your shoulder 

But you wear the old god's horns. 

And you dance around the maypole 

While the vicar makes a toast 

To the pagan celebration 

And extends an invitation to us all 

So he can save us when we fall. 



Who's your leading lady? 

Will you help to get her off the bus? It's best 

to pass the test before you get too lazy. 



Strike up the orchestra. 

Take your cues on the up-beat/Beat down 

Anyone who says he doesn't like the sound.