Get on my funbus, I'll take you all for a ride
I'll tell you about the Cuban's eight-foot stride
Punch me harder, I didn't feel a thing
All the kids appreciate the joy I bring

I'm always happy, ever so happy
There's no-one more happy, I'm a comedy grandad

Same old Northerner, always got nothing to say
All the same I think I'll say it anyway
Witness these overalls, these navy-blue overalls
I'm never happy, never been happy
It's not in my contract
quality janitor

Just after dusk I swing from the wrought iron gates
And remember the five o'clock tea-time smell of the 
estate
I'm always running, all knees and elbows
Got a stick with a spike on
Cartoon ducks laugh at me

I'm a comedy parkie and nobody loves me any more
A comedy parkie and nobody loves me any more

Nobody loves me any more
Nobody loves me any more
I'm the man who put Nick Straker on the floor
But nobody loves me any more