Well I plopped down in my easy chair and turned on Channel Two

A bad gun slinger called Salty Sam was a chasin' poor Sweet Sue

He trapped her in the old sawmill and he said with an evil laugh

If you don't gimme the deed to your ranch I'll saw you all in half

And then he grabbed her (and then) he tied her up (and then)

He turned on the buzz saw (and then and then) 

Eh eh and then along came Jones tall thin Jones

Slow walking Jones (deep voice) slow talking Jones along came long lean lanky Jones



Well commercial came on so I got up to get myself a snack

You should have seen what was going on by the time I got back

Down in the old abandoned mine sweet Sue was a havin' fits

That villain said gimme the deed to your ranch or I'll blow you all to bits

And then he grabbed her (and then) he tied her up (and then)

He lit the fuse to the dynamite (and then and then)

Eh eh and then along came Jones...

[ sax ]

Well I got so bugged I turned it off and turned on another show

But there was the same old shoot-em up and the same old rodeo

Salty Sam was a tryin' to stuff Sweet Sue in a burlap sack

He said if you don't give me the deed to your ranch

I'm gonna throw you on the railroad track

And then he grabbed her (and then) he tied her up (and then)

A train started coming (nd then and then) Eh Eh and then along came Jones...