I've got bad news baby, 

And you're the first to know 

Yes I've got bad news baby, 

And you're the first to know 

Well I discovered this morning that my wig is about to blow 



Well I've been rocking on my feet 

Ad I've been talking all out of my head 

Well, well I've been rocking on my feet 

And I've been talking all out of my head 

And when I get through talking, I can't remember a thing I've said 



Now I used to be a sharpie 

All dressed in the latest style 

But now I'm walking down Broadway 

Wearing nothing but a smile 

I see all kinds of little men 

Although they're never there 

I tried to push a subway train 

And poured whiskey in my hair 

I'm a gal who blew a fuse, I've got those blowtop blues 



Last night I was five feet tall, Today I'm eight feet ten 

Every time I fall downstairs, I float right up again 

When somebody turned the lights on me it like to drove me blind 

I woke up this morning in Bellevue but I've left my mind behind 

I'm a gal you can't excuse, 'cause I've got those blowtop blues 



Well I got high last night, and I took my man to his wife's front door 

Yes, yes I got juiced last night and I took my man to his wife's front door 

She was a 45-packin' mama, and I ain't goin' to try that no more!