I've learned to control my thoughts

ever since I recognized the first eavesdropper: 

those who listen in on my thoughts, 

my logic, my sanity



I cannot let them know I don't know

the verses, or converse in my head: 

lash out at future foes,

banter with friends I've not yet met 



The psychoaggressive minions of

your lord mock with laugher I can't hear, 

with hidden scowls they admonish me 



Nothing's sacred, Nothing's safe: 

your filthy god is omnipresent,

this undying nonentity that haunts

my every waking dream



They watch me, his mortal flock, 

they know me now by sight alone: 

my thoughts are too well concealed... 

Yet I sense more scrutiny



Fleeting lucidity's too loud for me, 

let me be my silent self:

our existences irreconciled



Make them stop! I'm rotting fast...

The answer, painful though it may be, 

is change



Alter my outer shell...

The listener's may not, then, know it's me

Open Face Surgery: short of pain

and long on masquerade

Ounce by ounce, lose a little weight

nip here, tuck there... So who needs eyelids?