Down here on the farm the weather gets messy laying around with nothing to do

When you went away you took my cow Bessie I miss her darling more than I miss you

You took off your leg your wig and your eye-glass

And you shoud've seen the look on my face

I wanted to kiss I wanted to hug you but you were scattered all over the place

Where oh where are you tonight why did you leave me here all alone

I searched the world over and I thought I'd found true love

You met another and (pfft) you were gone



I know that you loved me here's my way of knowing

The proofs hanging out right there on the line

When I see the snow and feel the wind blowing

Your nighties hugging them long johns of mine

The noises you made at our supper table your habits my dear, were surely absurd

But how many times do I have to tell you soup is a dish to be seen and not heard

Where oh where...



Remember you phoned me a sobbin' and cryin'

The dog bit your maw and drug her around

You said she looked pale and thought she was dying

I said don't worry I'll buy a new hound

I had six kids and you had eleven and we had eight more and they grew like flowers

I wish you'd come back without you ain't heaven

Cause your kids and my kids are beatin' up ours

Where oh where...