When we fall out
I like to go driving in my car
Listen to something ironic
And end up in a bar

Get an earful of shit from a stranger
Who's got a broken heart
Weighting up what would be more payful,
Staying with your man
Or going back to her

Refrain:
Doesn't everybody feel this way sometimes?
It's a lose-lose situation
For a shitty little clown
You can never win with women
It's pointless trying to try
It's a lose-lose situation till the day you die

Everybody knows the score
She'll be crying to the mother-in-law
And I'll be sleeping out with the dog
Must give interflora
A call, a call, a call, a call...

Refrain:
Doesn't everybody feel this way sometimes?
It's a lose-lose situation
For a shitty little clown
You can never win with women
It's pointless trying to try
It's a lose-lose situation till the day you die

Ooooh... Ooooh la-la-la
Ooooh... Ooooh la-la-la
Ooooh... Ooooh la-la-la
Ooooh... Ooooh la-la-la
Ooooh... Ooooh la-la-la
Ooooh...

Then we make up
I'm walking on egg-shells for a day
And I'll clean the house
And hope that I might get a lay
I've been back to that drunken stranger
And something that he says
"Pack your bags, alright?"
She'll be quiet when your dead

Refrain:
Doesn't everybody feel this way sometimes?
It's a lose-lose situation
For a shitty little clown
You can never win with women
It's pointless trying to try
It's a lose-lose situation till the day you die

And it's a lose-lose situation till the day you die