[Royce] What?  Uhh..

[Em] The Bad..

[Royce] Yeah..

[Em] The Evil..

[Royce] Right, yo

[Em] put em together



[Chorus: Royce the 5-9, Eminem]



[Royce] Yo if it wasn't for your whip, I'd have nothin to strip

[Em] If it wasn't for a wrist, I'd have nothin to slit

If it wasn't for the shrooms, I'd have nothin to chew

[Royce] Yo..

[both] I'm just fuckin with you, cause I got nothin to do



[Eminem]

I am bored!!!!!

I came in the diner with skateboarders, and placed orders

Ate hors d'oeuvres, and hit the waiter with plate warmers [crash sound]

Let you inhale the glock smell, while I'm rippin your wallet off 

and slippin a Molotov in your Cocktail (take that)

Burnin your contracts, punch your A&R in the face [punch sound]

Smash his glasses and turn em to contacts

I'm on some shook shit, if it's missin I took it (whoops!)

Nurse look at this straightjacket, it's crooked!

I go to jail and murder you from a cell

Put a knife in an envelope and have you stabbed in the mail (FedEx)

So how do you describe someone, with a decapitated head 

when the rest of his body's still alive RUNNIN?



[Royce]

Comin with five gunmen, waitin to do a drive-by

So when you see the black 500 (what?) hide from it

For every hundred MC's rhymin about birds

only about two-thirds'd really set it without words

Yo you ain't a thug, I can make you bitch up

Pick the fifth up, cock, spit, you would swear it's rainin slugs (what?)

I'm the hottest shit in the industry (uh)

I got every thug on the block that get a wind of me defendin me

You lack class and respect, get a direct backblast

The Bad and Evil mad rap, I cover the Bad half

You know how a thug in this shit'll end up

Spit a round, lift your chin up, you get hit, ten down and ten up (what?)

I take it if you run your mouth, then you wanna get sent up

Heat it up, you be leakin blood and spittin phlegm up

Now we rivals, cause of a small name or title

You stepped, got devoured and left with a flower and bible



[Chorus: x2]



[Eminem]

[yawns]  Forget a chorus -- my metaphors are so complicated 

it takes six minutes to get applause (yay)

And by the time you all catch on, I'ma end your career 

and walk away with the whole floor so you have nothin to fall back on!

I'll throw you off of ten floors .. *AHHHHHHH*

Pull a fuckin headache outta my head, and put it in yours (take this)

I'm indoors, waitin for this acid to seep in my skin pores

to go outdoors and do some in-stores

This bitch wanted to blow me, I said, "It oughta happen.

You swallow cum bitch?"   "No, but I brought a napkin"

Gettin skullie while I'm autographin

Got my daughter laughin cause I sent her mother whitewater raftin

I'm not a fact, I'ma proven fear

Mr. Rogers blocked up my U-haul screamin, 

"Wait, wait, wait.. you ain't movin here!"

Lorena Bobbitt, c'mere, want a souveneir?

I've been high as fuck, since I was a juvi-neer

Juvenile?  Same difference -- I need some 'caine 

cause I ain't sniffed since I woke up the seven slain infants

(Oh my God!) Brain implants and they say there's a slim chance

I won't stay the same cause I traded brains with a chimpanz'



[Royce]

Walkin in swamp water with an M-16, out for the blood

Shove a gun in the mouth of a thug

To break braces, you say grace and make faces

I'll display hate and break you in eight places (what?)

Take paces, turn around draw in a standoff

Precise aim, icin my fame, blowin your hand off

Dancin with the Devil leadin - I won't die, I'm never leavin (what?)

I pledge allegiance to forever breathin

Street niggaz with nuts, what?  My meat's bigger (what?)

Fake-ass thugs with toy guns and cheap triggers

with a deathwish, thinkin I'm the nigga to mess with

Let the tech lift, direct chest hit, melt your necklace

For instance, you just a henchmen, on tough soil (what?)

A follower never had heart, he just loyal

Thugs is glass doors, I see through em, put the heat to em

Be careful you might get what you ask for



[Chorus x2]



[Em]

The Bad.. the Evil..

The Bad.. the Evil.