My life is brilliant
My name is James
I'm only 7
And that explains
Why I've never had a best friend
Until you came along
But people stop and they look at us and they say that it's wrong

They say
You're a paedophile
You're a paedophile
You're a paedophile they say

You're name is Clive
And you're 45
But you don't let that come between us
And you make me hold your... hand

We went to the park
And we fed bread to a duck
And then you took me home
So that we could? eat dinner
And now I've got your fish fingers in my tum
And then you try to push your... food on my plate

You're a paedophile they say
You're a paedophile
You're a paedophile they say

But I don't care
Cause you're always there
Like when you helped me find my spectacles
And when you fiddled with my... hair

You find me after school
You watched me in the pool
You make me laugh when you act silly

You take me to the swings
You buy me sweets and things
Sometimes I play with your... watch

You're a paedophile they say
You're a paedophile
You're a paedophile they say

Or have I misheard
Yeah I've got the wrong word
I mean that you're my babysitter

And though you are my babysitter
You still take me up the... shops