I was 8 years old at the Astro Dome
Waiting in line to pee pee
The urinal line seemed to take forever
Then it finally came down to me
I unzipped my toughskins
And pulled out my little wee wee
Some drunk guy said "Hurry Up KID!"
But I couldn't spring a leak

I can't pee in front of you
But you can pee in front of me
I can't help it I've got stage fright
I've got Urinary Anxiety

And so it has been for 15 years
And I can't seem to shake my pee pee fears
I've gotta have a lock on the bathroom door
Before I can make the water fall on the floor
Can't wait for the moment in the shower
Hot water on my chest full power
Laugh as the lemonade hits the porcelain

I can't pee in front of you
But you can pee in front of me
I can't help it I've got stage fright
I've got Urinary Anxiety

I'm getting better at breaking boundaries
I'm learning to let myself be free
But whether I want this war or not
We'll just have to wait and see

When I can whip it out anywhere
Whether or not anybody's there
When I can just relax and pee
Then I can declare victory

I'm on a mission
I don't need no permission

I can pee in front of you
And you can pee in front of me
I ain't got no more stage fright
No Urinary Anxiety