I'm Palm Palm head

and I wrote one good song

But that was almost 20 years ago

I tried and I tried to follow it up

But you know how those sophomore jinxes go



So I became quite bitter

as sales dropped like flies

No one likes these dumb songs

of racing cars and spies



Maybe it's my ape drape

or hippies in my band

But now we only tour in Arizona

or Japan



So after much thought

and a panel of experts

I came up with a brilliant little plan

I'll take out my frustrations

on one of these ungrateful new punk rock bands



Cuz I invented socks

and I invented gravy

I made up the cotton gin

but no one ever paid me



Why beat a dead horse

with a career that is cursed?

I'll just sue for royalties

on things I thought of first



Back in Ancient Egypt

many Pharaohs went to jail

for misappropriation

of my Phrigian scale



I said listen to Tutankhamen

you're driving me insane

it's obvious those bellies

are all dancing to Bloodstains



I figured out you owe me

and please try not to laugh

but every time I hear it

I get one more golden calf



So I've bitten off

a sizable chunk

of the hands of the people

with the food



Now I'm confined to the pages of Flipside

a graveyard of punk rock's 35 year old dudes



Cuz I invented socks

and I invented gravy

I made up the cotton gin

but no one ever paid me



Why beat a dead horse

with a career that is cursed?

I'll just sue for royalties

on things I thought of first



Palm Palm!

Palm Palm!

Palm Palm!

Ape Drape!

Ape Drape!

Poodle Head!

Poodle Head!