It's X-mas on the Isthmus

of Panama

We're listless this Christmas

No Santa Claus

No wise men, no angels

No mistletoe trucks

No reindeer, no shepherds

We're shit out of luck

Ah we hung all our stockings

On the palm trees with care

Stayed up all night

Still nothin there

So we snorted some incense

And shot up some myrrh

Stayed up two more days

Just to make sure

Ah it's X-mas on the Isthmus

of Panama

It's hopeless, we're dopeless

No Santa Claus

No wise men, no angels

No mistletoe trucks

No reindeer, no shepherds

We're shit out of luck

Bethlehem...Bethle-her ... Bethle-you

Bethle-me ... Mucho

Ah there抯 something about X-mas

That brings me to tears

Snowmen an chestnuts

An roastin reindeers

That story from the Bible

God's only son

The immaculate injection

Ah you know the one

Well they wadn't from around here

They was Judean strangers

So they called up the front desk

"Let me speak to the Manger"

There was horses, there was cows

There was sheep, there was pigs

Mary asked Joseph

"Hey who booked this gig?"

Ah it's X-mas on the Isthmus

of Panama

We're shiftless, we抮e giftless

No Santa Claus

No wise men, no angels

No mistletoe trucks

No reindeer, no shepherds

We're shit out of luck

Bethlehem...Bethle-her ... Bethle-you

Bethle-me ... Mucho