(feat. Hot Waffles)



[Tom Rockwell - Sudden Death]

I'm being haunted by the ghosts of dead rappers from both coasts

Puttin out albums long after they've decomposed

So their lyrics are a little behind the times

But how do they get the dead to write rhymes?

Song after song on the radio I hear

is by a guy who died, in the yesteryear

But it's the best I hear of all the crap on the air

It's pretty sad when you compare it to those still breathin the air

I've been lookin for a deal since I wrote my first song

Now I finally realized what I've been doin wrong

It's not my cheesy beats or that my lyrics aren't strong

It's just the simple fact that I've been living too long!

Dead rappers got records flying off the shelf

So I might get a deal if I kill myself

That would pretty much guarantee more airplay

But I don't think that I'd be able to enjoy the extra pay

It blows me away what the dead are achieving

Silly me thought it'd be tough to rap without breathing

Don't ya know being dead seems to be the way to go

Look there's another dead rapper on the radio



[Hot Waffles]

Livin or not I gotta give 'em their props

They've been dead for years, but the rhymin don't stop

They'll be back, doesn't matter what the death report is

Throwin down and bein hard is now due to rigor mortis

That rapper died late last fall, he's still rotting in the hall

but now he's got gold records on the wall

It's the +Dawn of the Dead+, and the dead can rap

Still gettin paid while taking a dirt nap

In the store you hear the beats cranked high

You look the clerk in the eye and say, "Didn't that guy die?"

But their careers go on even though they're long gone

There's a signing next week out on Forest Lawn

Dead rappers got records on top of the charts

And all I got is a degree in liberal arts

That means that before I could ever be adored

I'd have to be full of formaldahyde and stiff as a board

I just can't believe what the dead are achieving

Like a rude houseguest who's just not leaving

It's another bonus for the record label CEO

Look - there's another dead rapper on the radio!



"He be passed on! He has ceased to be!

Homeboy has expired and gone to meet his maker!

This is a late rapper! They be stiff!

Bereft of life, O.G.s rest in peace!

Out!  Metabolical processes are of interest only to historians!

My man has hopped the twig!

Mofo has shuffled off this mortal coil!

Running upside the curtain and joined the choir invisible!

In short, this.... is an EX-RAPPER!"



[Tom Rockwell - Sudden Death]

Scott LaRock has been dead for like fifteen years

So he'll probably do a video with Britney Spears

Every year we hear the news, there goes another one

Lined up on Death Row (Waffles: Now that's a +Big Pun+)

Big L, Biggie Smalls, all the big rappers get death's glance

so Buffy didn't stand a chance

And the record labels won't leave well enough alone

Cause you can't collect royalties on a tombstone

I got some advice for the folks who hate Eminem

Don't kill him, cause then you'll never get rid of him

They'll put out best, worst, and unreleased rhymes

Guest vocals and home videos until the end of time

Dead rappers got records flying off the shelf

So here's a toast to Jay-Z's health

And to Puff Daddy, uh, P-Diddy or whatever

Live long and prosper, hell, live forever!

Cause once they're dead, we won't ever be free

No R.I.P. for R.A.P.

Don't ya know being dead seems to be the way to go

Look - there's another dead rapper on the radio



[Outro]

Yo, dawg, that rapper's only mostly dead

There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead

Mostly dead is slightly alive

Well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do

(What's what, yo?)

Go through his clothes and look for the bling bling!