(parody of "Around The Way Girl" by L.L. Cool J)



I want a girl with gravitational pull

Big as a cow, but not mean as a bull

A couple chins and a big behind

That's what I need to make the girlie all mine

She can waddle down the street talk with her mouth full

I love it when the woman spits food on the floor

Standing at the bus stop inhaling a lollipop

One she starts eating you can't make the hottie stop

She likes to dance to the rap song

But she always breaks the floor 'cause her legs are too strong

Prune wrinkled complexion, sits around the town

Let's hear it for the girl she's big and round.

[chorus]

I need a big 'n round girl

That's the one for me

I need a big 'n round girl



Dusted, rusted, her smile's like a skeleton's

That's why I had to dedicate this one

To all the cuties grazing in my back yard

If I didn't feed you then you'd probably starve

You eat all my sugar straight out of the jar

Gonna panic if I see you getting into my car

Boy you're fat, but at least you got nice looking hair

Even your cat is as big as a bean bag chair

You can break chairs and manipulate food

Or drink Welches then belch and act totally rude

You always know where the food can be found

Cold flip when you find a new diner in town

Not cheap or petty, just constantly hungry

You shower once a month so you smell real funky

But if you ever wanna fit in this world

Go on a diet girl

(chorus)



You bleached your hair just as white as you can

Now you look like the abominable snow man

I tell you come here and you say no way

'Cause you run out of breath and pass out half way

Around the way you ripped all your jeans

All the little kids use it for a trampoline

You wear a parachute for your biker shorts

While you're chillin' in the restaurant eating foods of all sorts

Going to the movies getting stuck in the door

While the business men in suits are throwing up on the floor

Fake hair flappin', both lips chappin'

You broke the toilet, it was bound to happen

We can go out and eat real well

I got a lot more fat jokes to tell

Lisa, Angela, get out of town

Before you get flattened, she's big and round

(chorus)