The guys are struttig proudly showing off their weenies
Top 40 garbage spewing expensive radios
As they primp their pampered bodies
And put schnozzguard on their nose
This ain't hawaii (x4)
Prep school blondes and musclemen with perfect heinies
There's more money on this beach than all the tea in china
Thie girls all look like Nancy Drew, the boys like Jim McMahon
And their fat, white, ugly parents look like Morey Amsterdam
This ain't hawaii (x4)
In droves they hit the beach in Porches and Ferraris
The sun has cooked their brain they're on a surf safari
The Lake is full of creepy snobs, I stare to get annoyed
This isn't Honolulu, this is Illinois
They're surfing in Wilmette