It's always been my fondest dream' 

I saw one in a magazine, 

And sent my order off six weeks ago 

Today a package came for me, 

From the Thompson company, 

The postman smile and winked 

and seemed to know. 

It was a Tommy-gun 

Model M1-45 

And as I opened it up, 

I was the happiest boy alive 

You know I'd have a lot more fun, 

if only I had a machine-gun 

You know I'd get alot more done, 

if only I had a machine-gun 

Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 

My own machine-gun 

Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 

My own machine-gun 

It's always been my fondest dream, 

A hundred round drum magazine, 

To write my name in lead 

upon the wall 

I'll open up my violin case, 

Point my heater at your face, 

I'll make you dance and 

have a fucking ball 

Just like Dillenger, 

And Bonnie & Clyde. 

Machine-gun etiquette's 

How they lived and died 

You know I'll have a lot more fun, 

now that I have a machine-gun 

You know I'll het a lot more done, 

now that I have a machine-gun 

Public enemy number one, 

now that I have a machine-gun 

In the dog day after-noon sun, 

now that I have a machine-gun 

Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 

My own machine-gun 

Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh!