I ask my wife what she'll cook

Sputter supper
Sputter supper

She smiles to me and answers short
"I got our neighbour in my pan"

Sputter supper
Sputter supper

Oh, he tastes good, feels fine for me
I want more food, I'm starving you see

"Darling," she says,"you get a sweet"
"I caught that child from the third floor"

Sputter supper
Sputter supper

Now I'm so full what a delicious dish
You're the best wife, I have no more to wish
You're feeding me great from day to day
And all our neighbours go away

My loved man it makes me happy
When you say good things about my cooking

Sputter supper
Sputter supper

Tomorrow I'll do a good dinner too
I'll try to catch our now janitor for...

Sputter supper
Sputter supper