Here we have our dust-free dining set 

We guarantee it won't collect a speck 

Freeing up the children to instead 

Grow into your molding 

Heed more of your scolding 

Go early to their new self-making beds 



Seems like you'd be tired of losing face 

Like you'd want to put the children in their place 

The more you have to tell them to do their chores 

The more you run the risk of being ignored 



If you're lucky they'll turn out as good as you 

You tell them that they're good kids but you know it isn't true 

Your father drank a little; you're on liver number two 

Progress has a way of feigning ease 

Convenient new inventions bait the tease 

For though it is impossible to cure: 

A husband bent on cheating 

The oxygen depleting 

A child who's always bragging 

A wife's persistent nagging 

We're equipped to live as though it were 



If you're lucky they'll turn out as good as you 

You tell them that they're good kids but you know it isn't true 

Your father drank a little; you're on liver number two