From a crack on my sealed window enters a ray of light

It falls down at the foot end of the bed

that I'm not going to leave (any more)

I curse you morning light, spot on my solitude

No one here to mourn with me the loss of hope in this life



The light that brings the day reminds me that I'm dead



I want to break out, I want to be free

And leave behind these chains that keep me captive

My life a ruin, it has ruined me

I smell my soul rotting; it fades away with the years



O bastard life, for too long you fooled me

You made me believe that you are worth to live



A growing fury, a growing pain 

enveloped my soul, paralysed my heart

love is a lie, hope is a morbid joke

every day the same old song



I want to break free from this vicious circle

To hear some words of comfort, to breathe some joy



I have passed the point of no return since long:

The gravity of this black hole is too strong

Look at me, disappearing within its darkness

My God, it hurts more than I could possibly imagine!



I must cope with the emptiness

Which has weaved its web around my soul

I've sunk in the abyss of desperation

And yet I'm here, a fool among the fools 



The hour has come...

the angel of death looks me straight in the eyes

like a basilisk

He stands there staring

with empty gaze- like an ancient statue

and tries to break the shield

which guards my empty soul

But all those joyless years

have eventually dried my tears

drained every emotion of my well-worn body

which slowly rots and disintegrates

The angel smells the stench of slow death

disgusted, he disappears into the night

I cut my flesh with my broken nails

enjoy the fluid of life flowing

The cancer has left my heart

and yet I'm more than ever dead...