Well, the man who preached the funeral

Said it really was a simple way to die

Well, he laid down to rest one afternoon

And never opened up his eyes.



They hired me and Fred and Joe

To dig the grave and carry up some chairs

It took us seven hours and I guess

We must've drunk a case of beer.



I guess I ought to go and watch them put him down

But I don't own the suit

Anyway when they start talking

About the fire and hell, well, I get spooked.



So I'll just sit here in my truck

And act like I don't know him when they pass

Anyway when they're all through

I got to go to work and mow the grass.



Well, here they come and who's that ridin'

In that big ole shiny limousine

Hmm, look at all that chrome I do believe

That that's the sharpest thing I've seen.



That must belong to his great Uncle

Someone said he owned a big ole farm

When they get parked I'll mosey down

And look it over, that won't do no harm.



Well, that must be the widow in the car

And would you take a look at that

That sure is a pretty dress you know

Some women do look good in black.



Why he's not even in the ground

And they say that his track is up for sale

They say she took it pretty hard

But you can't tell too much behind a veil.



Well, listen ain't that pretty

When the bugler plays the military taps

I think that when you's in the war

They always hired and played a song like that.



Well, here I am and there they go

And I guess you'd just call it my bad luck

I hope he'll rest in peace but trouble is

That fella owes me forty bucks...