i saw a modest dream

the kind that can't speak up

and lost before it's let out

in the north we hold our tongues


but down here i believe 

when you pull your hair back it's so easy to see

this has not been thought through

there are things that we've done that we cannot undo

there are things i can't hear when we're telling the truth


at a table out in bethel

when i was thirteen

the criminals were saying

liked how i was silent


the cold was the container

for the sparseness of our speech

the expression in our hands

was all that we'd need


but down here i believe

that i made a big deal with a girl that can't bleed

now I see red and black

and evening that kills i want to take it back

an evening that kills and i can't take it back


i'm going home back to new hampshire

i'm so determined 

to lay in lakes and see my sisters

i will hit my brother and hold my mother


this probably won't work out

we might not live forever

while there's nothing to confess

please pay attention


and i know that it's brief

there's not nearly enough in one night to have seen

what you had in your hand

was much more than the gold that i let go to grab

so much more than the gold that i let go to grab