swallowing an ocean of absence

soaking in the tortured admissions and passionate denials

the absent friends and enemies, the manufactured threats

the crushing weight of memories are all that I have left

the absence of feeling - no love, no pity, no hate

and the absence of anything as what's left of me

drowns in waves of mindless apathy, submerged in total despair

dilute the venom of misery

see the world through the bottom of a glass

as all sensation separates from a numbing heart

another dosage of the antidote suffocates emotion before it starts the same depression

the same fear...constant frustration at the same reflected stares

...but cold flesh protects my mind like a clear, smooth, hard bottle-glass skull

from crushing volumes of nothing