In the jungle of the city two tomcats chanced to meet
Omar and Bartholomew, tip-toeing round their beat

Their chests swelled up with envy (oh an envy most intense)
As each spotted his new rival beside a back-yard fence

Bartholomew's great tail (a tail of wide renown)
Made Omar stare insanely, that tail he'd love to own
Bartholomew stared also, he envied what he saw
He yearned to own the whiskers that Omar, proudly, wore!

A how! Soon broke the silence of that midsummer night.
Like David and Goliath, both cast aside all fright
As cat met cat in battle in battle in battle!
Oooh!!!

It was a beastly fight (ooh)
Both limpted home forlorn
All tails, all whiskers, gone! (oohh)