[Heems:]
Now shorty said I look like Carlos Mencia
Like Carlos Mencia?
Fuck Carlos Mencia
I said take notice, and ma please focus
I look like him, but mixed with George Lopez
Shorty said I look like Mario Lopez
With no lats, and no traps and no pecs
And no abs
Shorty said I look like Cro-mag
No man, that's a cave man
She told me I was racist at the rave, man

[Kool AD:]
Yeah shorty said I look like a Cro-mag too, man
She said I'm half Rasta, half pasta, no Ragu, man
Shorty said I look like Slash with no hat on
She asked if I had a spot where we could get our smash on
Shorty said I look like Devendra Banhart
Shorty said I look like that dude from Japan's art
You know the dude that did the Kanye album covers
Shorty said I look just like Egyptian Lover

[Heems:]
Yeah, we was kicking it
I said "You chillin, ma? "
Shorty said I look like a chubby Jake Gyllenhaal
I said, this ain't "Brokeback"
And I'm a broke mack
Type so hard, I'm now typing on a broke Mac
Book Air, well girl you look here
I look real fly
And we fly high
I'm like the Latino cop on CSI-I-I

[Kool AD:]
Shorty said I look like the guy
Who did that song "La Bamba"
What was his name? Ay-carumba!
I don't even know, shorty wanna do the rumba
I said that was dumb, thu
Wait, shorty said I look like Osama
Plus Obama, minus the drama
Shorty wanna meet my momma
Shorty said I look real calm
And maybe I got good karma

[Heems:]
Shorty said I look like Aditya Pancholi, Chunky Pandey or Deepak Tijori
Maybe John Abraham or Shahrukh Khan
Amitabh Bachchan, Salman Khan
Amir Khan, Kader Khan
Genghis Khan or Irrfan Khan

[Kool AD:]
I just wanna eloheinu all night long
Shorty said I look like the dude from the Passion of the Christ
Jesus Christ
Shorty said I smell like beans and rice
Shorty said I look like the dude from the Passion of the Christ
Yeah, shorty said it twice
Shorty said I was nice
Yeah, shorty bit my ear like Mike Tyse
Shorty said I look like Bob Weisz
Shorty said I look like Swizz Beats but like
Minus the ice
Shorty said I'm nice, yeah shorty said it twice

[Heems:]
Shorty said I look like Shaun Bridgmohan
I said maybe I might just look like just Mohan
Broham, or maybe Rohan
Shorty said the ninja that she with ain't this
And shorty said I act like a gay David Banner on acid
Shorty said I look like I work in a garage
Shorty said I'm Turtle from Entourage
And she looks like Sloan
And when we bone
Shorty don't say much, shorty just moan
And that's cause I'm a freak, yo
Shorty said I look like Richard Grieco

[Kool AD:]
Grieco or Greco?
Shorty said I look like Art Deco
Shorty said I look like the gecko from the Geico commercials
Plus the caveman too, she hurt me

[Heems:]
She hurt you too?

[Kool AD:]
She hurt a lot of fools
Oh my god she did a lot to a lot of fools
Shorty said I look like the dude who cuts her roses
She forgets his name but she supposes it was Moses
Wait, Moises?
Shorty asked why all the boys-es from all those places
Have such strange names and faces
I told her das racist
I told her das racist
I told her das racist
I told her das racist
I told her das racist, she likes me cause I'm tasteless
I gave her bracelets and we hit it in her momma's basement
Adjacent to her gay sister's dark room
Shorty says I look like a cartoon
Like a dude throwing a harpoon at a whale and shit