[Verse:]
That's right party people, Dana Dane is back!
Hurby behind the board of the twenty-fo' track machine
Making sure the beats come out clean
As I tell you this tale of a Christmas scene
It all began in a far off land
Do you know the Drummer Boy? Well, I'm the Rapper Man
I wandered and wandered with no main course
Drawn to a campsite by some strange force
Now, in this camp lived three wise men
They said, "Dana Dane, where have you been?"
They said that they had been expecting me
Told me to kick off my sandals and relax my feet
We started to talk, a lot of time was spent
Tale of how emcees wouldn't be content
'Til the Christmas spirit was gone and demolished
And I was the only one who could abolish their plan
So I took a stand!
But they said I must journey across the land
I said, "Listen my friend, I'll be glad to go
But the sand out there is worse than snow"
The first wise man said, "Yes, that's true"
To protect my feet, gave me Bally shoes
The second wise man said, "Yes, you're right"
And gave me a Kangol to shade my eyes
The third wise man, leaning on a cane
Said "Take this mic, rapper Dana Dane!"
He said that the mic would help my words
Of Christmas cheer be clearly heard

[Verse 2:]
Well I started my journey at the first light
I travelled the desert for a fortnight
I sighed, I tried, the North Star my guide
Pulled my Kangol over my eyes
Took off my Ballys, dumped the sand on the side
Put my Ballys back on and continued my stride
Off I went through the sand and mist
Taking all types of chances and all kinds of risks
It was Christmas Eve, time was growing short
Then I came upon the place that I had sought
Went up to the door, straight in the palace
Faces were filled with contempt and malice
Up on the stage, what did I see?
That's right, party people -- a sucker emcee
Went up on the stage, plugged in my mic
To the sucker emcee I said "Good night!"
Off he went, he was steaming mad
Talk about relief! The crowd was glad
I said, "Have no fear, cause I am here
To wish a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year"
I continued on, they began to believe
And the Christmas spirit was soon retrieved
The fingers were popping, the house cold rocking
Talk about staring -- girls were cold clocking
Mission complete, I was on my way
Girls in back of me screaming, "Dane, please stay!"
But I couldn't cause I had done my thing
And as I walked out the door I heard them all sing

[Singers]
Sucker emcees, you better watch out!
All emcees, you gotta watch out!
Dana Dane is coming to town

Dana Dane is coming
Dana Dane is coming
Yes, Dana Dane is coming
To town