C W McCall
C W McCall - Crispy Critters lyrics
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(c.w. mccallbill frieschip davis) Bill fries says that this is based on a true story from the late '60swhen a band of hippies rolled into telluride and decided to stay. One day about four or five years ago We is settin' at the conoco station Kickin' tiresand swattin' flies And discussin' the state of the union When right out in front of the baptist church Come a big ol' purple school bus Had astrological signs upon it And thirty-five hippies and dogs inside About half of 'em went for the courthouse lawn And them dogs commenced on the fireplug Rest of 'em set there starin' at us And I says"roygo get your flit gun" He says"which is the hippies? and which is the dogs? " I says"beats the hell outta meroy." What they waswas a bunch a' them crispy critters And their leader was a space cadet He says"sagittariuswe has arrived. "prepare to disembarkmen. "get the incense goin' and the sitar out "we gonna camp in the city parkman." I says"boyslet me explain the situation to ya. "a: you're gettin' me down "and b: we got us a leash law here "and c: you in the wrong town. "you drop one string a' beads in that there park "and you gonna see a whole lotta stars. "you got fifteen seconds to get out of townboys "or we gonna blow ya ta mars." Wellthey all got back in the purple bus And proceeded to the city limits. Then the telephone rangwas the swimmin' pool Says a mess a' wild critters was in it! So we all got in the marshal's plymouth (which is always at the conoco station) Went flashin' on down to the swimmin' pool To give them critters a citation By the time we arrivedit was too damn late Them critters is all had their pants down Them dogs was tearin' the bathhouse apart And they's after the fish in the fish pond! I says"royyou get the one in the silver t-shirt "and I'll get the rest with a net. "we gonna have a jail full a' naked crispy critters "and a drip-dry space cadet." [you've watched the dukes of hazzardhaven't you? c'monadmit it; nobody's looking. wellat this point in the song there's a short interlude which resembles a car chase on dukes. there's banj Kin' and yee-hawin' and a general sense of raucous abandon. ohyeahand a few dog barks. it's round-up time at the swimmin' pool.] Wellwe gave 'em hellbut we lost the war 'cause them critters outnumbered us So they moved in and set up camp And they lived in that purple school bus Six weeks laterthere was nothin' in town But eighty-four dogs and a head shop Sellin' dried up weedsand sunflower seeds And astrological postcards Yeahcritters took over the city council And the dogs all barked their brains out And the whole damn town was crispy critters And the mayor was a space cadet