I can make anybody pretty
I can make you believe any lie
I can make you pick a fight
With somebody twice your size

Well, I've been known to cause a few breakups
And I've been known to cause a few births
I can make you new friends
Or get you fired from work

And since the day I left Milwaukee
Lynchburg, Bordeaux, France
I've been making the bars
With lots of big money
And helping white people dance
I got you in trouble in high school
And college now that was a ball
You had some of the best times
You'll never remember with me
Alcohol, alcohol

I got blamed at your wedding reception
For your best man's emberrasing speech
And also for those naked pictures of you at the beach
I've influenced kings and world leaders
I helped Hemingway write like he did
And I'll bet you a drink or two that I can make you
Put that lampshade on your head 

And since the day I left Milwaukee
Lynchburg, Bordeaux, France
I've been making a fool out of folks just like you
And helping white people dance
I am medicine and I am poison
I can help you up or make you fall
You had some of the best times
You'll never remember with me
Alcohol, alcohol

Yes, since the day I left Milwaukee
Lynchburg, Bordeaux, France
I've been making the bars
With lots of big money
(And helping white people dance)
I got you in trouble in high school
And college now that was a ball
You had some of the best times
You'll never remember with me
Alcohol, alcohol
Alcohol, alcohol