Zero Mostel
Zero Mostel - If I Were A Rich Man lyrics
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it's no great shame to be poor... but it's no great honor, either. So what would have been the difference if I had... a small fortune? If I were a rich man, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum If I were a wealthy man. I wouldn't have to work hard, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum If I were a biddy-biddy rich, Daidle deedle daidle daidle man. I'd build a big tall house with rooms by the dozen Right in the middle of the town, A fine tin roof with real wooden floors below. There would be one long staircase just going up And one even longer coming down, And one more leading nowhere, just for show. I'd fill my yard with chicks and turkeys and geese And ducks for the town to see and hear, Squawking just as noisily as they can, And each loud "pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack! pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack!" Would land like a trumpet on the ear, As if to say, "Here lives a wealthy man." Oy! If I were a rich man, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum If I were a wealthy man. I wouldn't have to work hard, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum If I were a biddy-biddy rich, Daidle deedle daidle daidle man. I see my wife, my Golde, looking like a rich man's wife, With a proper double chin, Supervising meals to her heart's delight. I see her putting on airs and strutting like a peacock, Oy! What a happy mood she's in, Screaming at the servants day and night. The most important men in town will come to fawn on me-- They will ask me to advise them, Like a Solomon the Wise-- "If you please, Reb Tevye?"-- "Pardon me, Reb Tevye?"-- Posing problems that would cross a rabbi's eyes-- (chanting) Ya va voy, ya va voy voy vum... And it won't make one bit of difference If I answer right or wrong-- When you're rich, they think you really know. If I were rich, I'd have the time that I lack To sit in the synagogue and pray, And maybe have a seat by the Eastern wall, And I'd discuss the learned books with the holy men Seven hours every day-- That would be the sweetest thing of all... Oy! If I were a rich man, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum If I were a wealthy man. I wouldn't have to work hard, Daidle deedle daidle Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum Lord who made the lion and the lamb, You decreed I should be what I am-- Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan, If I were a wealthy man