Twiztid
Twiztid - A Very Twiztid Christmas lyrics
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(featuring Blaze, Big Stank & Lil Poot) Alright, so let me get this right, you say it's a motherfucker who come to your house... To your muthafucking house And he ain't be trying to rob you? Ah hell no, that's Santa Dawg, you ain't ever heard of Santa? Nuh uh Santa Claus, Saint Nick? Nah Kris Kringle? Man nah! You ain't ever heard of Kris Kringle? Man Hell nah!! Look (What?), he come down the chimney in some spots, but some people they ain't got no chimney, so he just come in tha back dooor, he may have to kick it in though, depending it what hood he in, cause some people be bolting they shit Who? You know like Kwee-Kwee and them down there on west 7 mile, you know, swinginh the herb Fool, I know who that is, who you talking about kicking in some DOORS? Santa, SANTA CLAUS!...Ho Ho Ho everybody's Jolly Oh, you mean the motherfucker who be ringing the bell down in front of Churches' Chicken Something like that, except he come and he be bringing gifts, it's like religious thing or something Man, you acting like a sucker believing in that Fishtishish Bullshit! Man, I don't even like fish! so, LOOK! WHAT? He's looking at his list Right He's checking it twice Right, Right And he gonna know who's naughty or nice Man, hell nah, so what you saying, this motherfucker work for the FBI? he got a list, what kind of list? I mean, it's kinda like that,it ain't really a list like that,I mean its Christmas list, you know like gifts and stuff... remember when you was and you wanting Space Invaders for the 5200 back in '86? (yea), and then nobody got it for you? (uh huh), cause you wasn't right, Santa was like Fuck that, I ain't bringing him shit, I'mah gonna bring my homie Lil Poot erythang. Well fuck SANTA, and fuck you Man fuck you man, you don't be dissing no Santa Claus, dawg I don't be beliving in that shit, that shit ain't even real, man you acting like a little sucker beliving in some old Santa Claus shit Man, SANTA for life fool *have you been a good boy this year? if not I'm gonna split your fucking head!" With so much Drama in the D-E-T It's kinda hard putting trimin's on my Christmas Tree But, I some how, some way Keep coming up with fresh ass nizzle just to drizzle on the way May I, wrap another gift, so that I, can sneek up in your house in the bedroom Everybody tripping, roasting chestnuts, waiting on Santa to come I got Blaze in the living room drinking Egg-Nog Jamie's in the kitchen and he pulling the bomb I got Little Eric Loder dressed up like a Elf And, all they keep saying is "go fuck yourself" So, turn off the lights and close the doors Man for what? Santa Claus Hoe And, we gonna blow ounce with him G's up, hoes down, I got Santa Claus high as shit Chorus: Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog. Waiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-Nog. With my Mind on my presents And my presents on my mind Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog Waiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-Nog With my mind on my presents And my presents on my mind Mixing Egg-Nog and Gin everybody got their cups but they ain't chiped in Well I called up Blaze told him, time for dime He said him and Anybody coming through at nine See everything is fine, cause I'm feeling all Christmassy And I'm standing right next to the Christmas tree Seeing the blinking lights made me sick But I always decorate every year for Saint Nick So, there ain't no chance he gonna pass me up Got some Cocoa in a cup and some Hydro in a blunt That I am gonna smoke with Santa Claus Get him all shit-faced till the break of dawn And, watch him fly off in the night Hey thanks for the presents, I hope you make it home alright Before he left he said "Hey, Listen Bro" "Your the first stop I made, I gotta billon more to go". *Chorus* Later on Christmas Day My homie Violent J Came through with a gift for me And a dope ass fruit cake "aight dawg", With a phat ass joint with the blue cots That make ya choke, with some bud, ain't no choke Had to take a step back, sit my Egg-Nog down, knocking Rum and cot I'm fucked up now, but ain't no body clap, the presents are wrapped Shaggy's style through with a 40 in a sac "roll it up" Smoke with Santa, break with the elves They supposed to stop by at a half past twelve *Chorus* Shit If I would of known we was getting shit for free I would have pulled my dick out!