It was a cold night in a hot town 

When the alderman's wife pulled her shirt down 

She was on to Tommy like a cheap suit 

She thought his hair was cute or something



It was a cold night in a hot town 

When the alderman's wife let her guard down 

She was so excited she could hardly speak 

The tequila swept her off her feet or something



There's a million stories in the naked dominion 

Coast to coast 

The real Canadians, the real Canadians



It was a hot night in a cold town 

When a young accountant let his hair down 

I must admit he was a cute fruit 

But Harley gave him the boot anyway



There's a million stories in the naked dominion 

Coast to coast 

The real Canadians, the real Canadians



At a retirement party in a naval town 

A Canadian groupie laid her guns down 

When we asked her if she was really ready 

She said she and Jesus were goin' steady



There's a million stories in the naked dominion 

Coast to coast 

The real Canadians, the real Canadians, the real Canadians ...



From the Malahat, to Kitimat, to Medicine Hat to Uranium City 

From Thunder Bay, to Saint Jervais,  

all the way to St. Johns, Newfoundland

The real Canadians ...