by Charlie Daniels



Me and my buddy got us a wild hair

And figured we wanted to go somewhere

So we loaded up in my ragtop Chevrolet

We had a little bit of money 

And a whole lot of show

Adn with Hank Jr. blaring on the radio

We got us a tank full of gas

And we was on our way



We figured we'd go down to New Orleans

We were barrelling down old 17

When a man with a blinking red light 

Was on our tail

He said you were doing 60 in a 45

But I'm gonna let you go this time

But if I catch you again

I'm gonna slap you in the county jail



We said thank you sir you sure been nice

And you ain't gonna have to tell us twice

And we were Southbound and down with the wind 

Blowing in our faces

We kept on rolling and pretty soon

The radio was cooking out a Haggard tune

And we were pulling into Houston

Checking out all them places



I was feeling dry and I said I think

We ought to stop and get ourselves a drink

And old Jim said yeah 'cause we got time to kill

We kept on rolling and I seen this spot

And we pulled into the parking lot

Of this place called the Cloud Nine Bar and Grill





We walked through the door

And the place was jammed

The lights were low they had a punk rock band

And some orange haired feller singing about suicide

I said Jim this ain't our kind of place

He said well let's just have one round anyway

So against my better judgement we walked on inside

Went up to the bar and we sat down

This feller walked up and said I'll buy this round

And he sat down on the barstool next to Jim



He looked like a girl but he talked like a guy

He had lipstick on and mascara in his eyes

And everybody in that place looked just about like him

I said Jim this ain't our kind of bar

Let's just go on out and get back in the car

'Cause there's gonna be trouble 

Ain't no sense in taking a chance

We was getting up getting ready to leave 

When somebody grabbed old Jim by the sleeve 

And this good looking girl was asking my buddy to dance



I said Jim don't do it there's something missing

There's fellers dancing and fellers kissing

There's a feller in high heeled shoes wearing panty hose

He said partner I just can't turn this down

You just go over there and have one more round

And I'll dance with the lady 

And we'll get on down the road



So he walked away and left me alone

But this funny looking feller kept coming on

And he was making me mad with some of the things he said

Then he put his hand on my knee

I said if you don't get your paw off me 

I'm gonna locate your nose around

The other side of your head



He said I love it when you get that fire in your eye

I said well partner try this on for size

And I unloaded on him and he went out like a light

Everybody in that place must have been his friend

They all headed for me I said this is the end

But where I come from we don't give up 

Without a fight



They were screaming and yelling and scratching and clawing

I was punching and hitting and kicking and pawing

I was holding my own 'cause I've been in a scrap or two

Old Jim come running up out of the blue

And that gal he was with come running up too

And proceeded to beat on me with a high heel shoe



I grabbed her by the hair it came off in my hand

And that beautiful girl was just a beautiful man

And old Jim just got sick right there on the floor



He dropped that dude like a shot from a gun

Smeared his lipstick made his makeup run

And me and old Jim started fighting our way to the door



We lit out of there in that Chevrolet

I put in on the floor and it stayed that way

We were going down the highway 

Doing about a hundred and ten

We were headed for home and we was getting nearer

Then a red light came on the rear view mirror

And that same blame cop was pulling us over again



Now I'm sitting here in this county jail

I had to call my daddy to go our bail

But I learned me a lesson 

That I never will forget again

I've done give up drinking I've give up bars

And running around the country in souped up cars

I'm going back where the women are women

And the men are men





Copyright 1988 Miss Hazel Music