so what is the deal? any blood on my hands should be mine 
anyway. i would rather stab this knife myself into the 
back of my own destiny. i understand you have your 
doubts. and so have i. i am not just losing it. risking 
the mission. spoiling operation steady. making a decision 
this time. i am not afraid to finish last. if that means 
first place. so cut your stake i am only competing with 
myself.