(A Regional Tragedy)



He was a panhandle prince卆hhh

Schoolboy football king

They told him "Hi" in the halls

'Cause he could run them balls

But it was rumored (down deep) he was mean

He dated high-tone girls

With frosty pom-pom curls

But he never gave out his ring

He was the best of the best

He met the grid-iron test

An there ain't nothin卆s American

An clean

He was the pride of the backfield

Ahhh the hero of his day

Yeah he carried the ball for the red and blue

They won District Triple-A

An his name made all the papers

As the best they'd ever had

Yeah so nobody understood it

When the Great Joe Bob went bad

First he lost his scholarship

To Texas Tech

For drinking during training

An breaking the coach's neckåŽÆ'eah

Then he got suspended (ahhh) for acting obscene

Around the Cum-Laudy, Cum-Laudy

Daughter of the Dean

So

He took up with a waitress

Named Loose Ruby Cole

While she was a-hoppin' tables

Down at the Hi-D-Ho

An he met her on the sly

When her daddy weren't around

Yeah but he stopped making yardage

When he started messin 'round

(chorus)

Yeah it spread like a country wildfire

That something big had gone all strange

Joe Bob the Greatest Halfback

Was actin half-deranged卆hhh

He'd been seen out with this woman

Gettin drunk and havin fun

Yeah he growed his hair, then gived up prayer

An said, "Football days is done"

Then

He and old Loose Ruby

Robbed a Pinkie's Liquor Store

An had a run-in with the law

When they's runnin out the door

An Joe Bob's fate was sealed

For the next century

Yeah he traded in the pigskin

For the penitentiary

(chorus)