In a cave near home
I found the scroll
Old Hebrew, or something close
written on it

Stooped over thick volumes, slow working
translation came as follows (roughly)

Refrain:
'Though shalt write about yourself, you please me when you do
My wish for mankind is for mankind to study you. For I so loved the world
that I gave you three chords, so you'd write about yourself... ya-da-ya-da-ya-da,' -The Lord

Not a shock, because
Who'd forget Great Uncle Seth's
frustrated ancient Hebrew

He used to hold me
hostage on his knee
and tease me with some secret
God told him about me

Refrain

Seth, I was your favorite
you died when I was ten
I never loved you back
and I remember why again

Did you see me spread your ashes
when we cremated you?
There's been another fire
and I spread your gospel too