Do you think you can fool me?
Do you think you can lie to my face?
Do you think I believe you?
Well, what you tell me is a total waste

Do you think you can use me?
I bet you think that you are great
Do you think you can get away with murder?
I think you can use a kick in the face

Eh - you can fool some of the people some of the time
And you can fool most of the people all of the time
Ah - you can fool a few of the people none of the time
But you can’t fool me any of the time

So I sit and I eat a TV dinner
I watch an old funny Marx Brothers movie
And a flash comes across my TV screen
And it’s you in all of your glory

You like to tell me about brutal murders
You make me choke on my pasgetti
Korean airlines that was shot down by the Russians
You even show the dead peoples’ families crying

Well, you can gross out some of the people some of the time
Eh - you can gross out most of the people none of the time
Most of the people like to get grossed out all of the time
Ain’t that right
But you make me sick every time, every time

I see your face is laced with a new kind of taste
It’s great the way you waste all that space
You’re right, it’s night and I shouldn’t go outside
But if a stiletto stabs me
It’ll make your job so exciting
If a razor cut me
You can give them something worth watching

We interrupt this song to bring you a special
News bulletin. Hello, this is Wilma Wasko,
Anchorwoman at the Eyewitness News Center
In New York. Hey - do I have your attention?
Look at me, me, me (etc.) I’m on TV. Check
This out, ladies and gents. This is good stuff,
Real good stuff, real
Good-good-good-good-good-good great stuff.