I went to your wedding
Although I was dreading
The thought of seeing you...(laugh)... oh, that face!
My poor heart was praying
To hear the groom saying
"I do, I do, I do"... (laugh)... oh, that poor fish... 
I'm sorry.

You tripped on the aisle
Fell flat on your... (laugh)... smile
Your father was loaded too...(laugh)... oh, what a mess!
He dragged your bouquet
The rest of the way
And then... (snigger)... and then... (laugh)...
He went back and dragged you... (laugh)

Your mother was laughing
Your father was laughing
And I was... (manic laughter)... too
We all had hysterics
At last we got rid of YOU!