(Harry)
A man should call the toss
Wear the pants and be the boss
A man should be the drake for his own damn sake
And men should be the misters
And the masters of their sisters
A man should be the reason for a heart to break
A man should cut the lawn
Change a tire, mend the worn
A man should never wait to oil a rusting gate
Men should hold the key positions
In our country's great traditions
A man should put the food upon the family plate
(Marines)
So, be moral, don't quarrel
Fair and square is best
(Ladies)
Let me alert you that virtue
Won't hurt you or desert you
(Rednecks)
If you wear hair on your chest
(Chorus)
So always remember to follow the rules
(Marines)
Box clever
(Rednecks)
And jocks never
(Harry)
Hock another jock's tools!
A man should wax a car
Fix a fuse, and tend the bar
A man should like his brow to be wet with sweat
Men should know the right occasions
To indulge in tax evasions
A man should know the settings
That his spark plugs get
Faggots are maggots
Thank God I'm a man