Oh, I'm the new baby of the house,
so kiss your life good bye
I'll be needing a few supplies
You'll be needing a second job
Oh, I sleep a lot during the day,
but at two a.m. it's time to PLAY!
and I promise to hold in my pee,
until you take my diaper off

Oh, you can bury your face in my tummy
and I'll spit up on your hair
I smell like heaven above,
but not below
to watch my Dad try to figure out why!
Whenever I am nursing,
he gives me dirty looks

My parents say goo goo goo
I think they're retarded
There's no need to vacuum
I'll eat everything on the floor
And my Dad thinks I can do no wrong
Wait til I'm 12 and he finds my BONG!
He bought me GUESS designer pants 
GUESS what I just did in them!