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From: OpenFace@aol.com
Date: Fri, 12 Jan 1996 22:14:11 -0500
Subject: CRD: "Jeannie's Got a Problem With Her Uterus," Screeching Weasel

"Jeannie's Got a Problem With Her Uterus"
performed by Screeching Weasel
written by Ben Weasel
(C) 1992 No Budget Productions
(P) 1992 Lookout! Records
from the Lookout! Records release Wiggle (LK 63 LP/CS/CD)
transcribed by Mike Ripplinger (openface@aol.com)

***
["Jeannie's Got a Problem With Her Uterus"

[ A / E / D ] x4

[Verse]:
A                D                 A  E
Jeannie's having problems with her ovaries
          A       D        E
She's got trouble with her tubes
       A             D            A               E
If you go past her vagina and her cervix you will find
     A       D     E
A completely empty room

[Chorus]:
      A               G
Cause Jeannie's got a problem with her uterus
              D
Her uterus is useless
A               G
Jeannie's got a problem with her uterus
              D
Her uterus is useless

[Verse]:
Her physician injected fluids in her private parts
But she just won't believe
That the efforts to erradicate her female trouble
Will cause her to conceive

[Repeat Chorus]

A             D  E       A             D  E
Jeannie isn't ovulating, Jeannie isn't ovulating
A             D  E      A    E  D
Jeannie isn't ovulating now

   A                         E
No simple yeast or bladder infection could compare
       G                   D                  A
To the pain that Jeannie's going through this year
                                    E
Her husband's sperm was studied and swiftly passed the test
    G            D             A
Now Jeannie's operation must commence
E              G          A(12th)
  Artificial insemination can't
E              G                A(12th)
Fertilize poor Jeannie's rotten eggs

[ A / E / D ] x4

[Verse]:
Jeannie isn't ovulating even though
She took all the proper pills
Jeannie wants a baby but she cannot pay
The gigantic doctor bills

[Repeat Chorus twice]

[End on A]

Lead
E-----------------------------------------------------------
B-----------------------------------------------------------
G--9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9--
...husbands sperm was studied and swiftly passed the test

E-------------------------------------------
B-------------------------------------------
G--9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9--
   Now Jeannie's operation must commence

E----------------------------------------------------
B----------10-------------10-------------------------
G--9-9-9-9--------9-9-9-9-------9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9-9--
           Arti - fic -   ial insemmination can't

E------------------------------------------------------------------|
B----------10-----------10-------------10--------------------------|
G--9-9-9-9------9-9-9-9-------9-9-9-9------9-9-9-9-9-9-------------|
D--------------------------------------------------------------7---|
   Fer -   ti - lize    poor Jeannie's rotten eggs       Yeah!