Why you at the clinic ked?

Same thing as you.

I've got infections on my mickey that have spread to my pubes.

Did the doctor give you penicillin, condoms or lubes?

No he gave me a lecture and a strict set of rules.

He said

Getting your hole is really taking its toll

You've been riding all your groupies and spending all your dole.

Your sexual health is getting out of control

So follow my directions for the sake of your soul

You only shift girls

To save all your money

You only shift girls

You cant have no fanny

You only shift girls

To save all your money

You only shift girls

On the mouth

Wait wait wait so the doctor told you you're only allowed to shift girls, and nothing else?

No nothing

Best of luck with that

Time went by and the hours turned into days

I wasnt riding girls, I was taking them on dates

I couldnt think of sex so I was filling up the space

with deep conversations and staying up late

and when the time came that she would ask me for some more

I'd shift her on the lips then kick her out the door

But celibacy

as hard as it can be

Has got advantages and bonuses as I've come to see

By not having sex

I did not expect

That girls will cook you dinner when you show them respect

And now I shift girls

and spend all their money

I like to shift girls

I dont want no fanny

I like to shift girls

And spend all their money

I like to shift girls

On the mouth

I never thought my life would be as happy as this

if I need something done I use the power of the shift

This girl is washing my car

That one is sweeping my rug

because I refused them both a ride and theyve confused it with love

I like to shift girls

While they're ironing my jocks

or fixing holes in my socks

and when I have chickenpox

I like to shift girls

While Im checking my mails

and when Im hammering nails

or pelting houses with snails

I like to shift girls

While im fishing for perch

and when Im dressed as a nurse

Thats robbing shit from her purse

I like to shift girls

WHile im filling a bath

and during a panic attack

or making tea for a jap

I like to shift girls

Reading frederick neitzche

and drawing pictures of priests

then tearing leaves from a tree

I like to shift girls

when my fantas gone fizzy

spinning round til Im dizzy

soaking a tampon in whiskey

I like to shift girls

wondering if theres a god

and checking underneath logs

trying to measure a dog

I like to shift girls

Pointing at pakistan

Dont give a f**k who they am

I even shifted a man

and if theres noone around

and i cant find a girl

I dig a hole in the ground

and start shifting the world

I like to shift girls