One, two,
A one two kazoo
If I were a gorilla,
La la la la la
I'd eat me a banana.
Na na na na na
I'd live in a treehouse
And swing on a vine,
But one thing is sure:
I would love ya,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And if I were a tuba,
Ba ba ba ba ba
All I'd do is oompah.
Pah pah pah pah pah
I would take a big breath,
And I would march in a band,
But one thing is sure:
I would love ya,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
'Cause it don't matter to me-
Whatever you happen to be;
An eagle,
An onion,
A pig or a grape,
As long as you're you,
I will love ya.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And if I were a space ship,
Ip ip ip ip ip
I would take a long trip.
Rip rip rip rip rip
I would circle the planets
And head for the stars,
And then I'd come home,
'Cause I love ya.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And if I were a daisy,
Sy sy sy sy sy
Would you still be my baby?
By by by by by
I would pull all my petals out,
One at a time,
And always come up with
I love ya
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
'Cause it don't matter to me-
Whatever you happen to be;
A beagle,
A grunion,
A fig or an ape,
As long as you're you,
I'll still love ya.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ba-bum-bump.