You're probably thinking to yourself

"Ninja Sex Party, you're awesome!"

We know

But thank you anyway



You're having trouble deciding

Which one of us to have sex with

That's natural

But nice of you to say



Well maybe I can help you out

Clear up all of your confusing doubts

Do you want sex with a ninja

Or sex with a guy like me



The choice should be so obvious (Dan)

And although he is mysterious (Brian)

Don't you want a man who's tall whose name is Dan

And is Jewish



One other thing...



Everyone in the band has an STD

Except for me

By the process of elimination

You can make determinations

On who just that might be



It's Brian

Brian has an STD



...I'm sorry.