Well if no one ever marries me

And I don't see why they should

Nurse says I'm not pretty 

And you know I'm seldom good, seldom good



Well if no one ever marries me

I shan't mind very much

Buy a squirrel in a cage

And a little rabbit-hutch



No one marries me

If no one marries me

No one marries me

If no one marries me

Well if no one marries me



I'll have a cottage near a wood

And a pony all my own

A little lamb quite clean and tame

That I can take to town



When I'm really getting old

At twenty-eight or nine

I'll buy myself a little orphan-girl

And bring her up as mine



No one marries me

If no one marries me

No one marries me

If no one marries me

If no one marries me

Marries me

Well if no one marries me

Marries me

If no one marries me