Had a crush on Santa

Since I was 9 years old

But Santa why do you go?

Once a year you come visit me

Eat my cookies, leave presents

the same old routine



But now Santa I want something more

No presents are what this girl's asking for

Santa sleep with me tonight.Yeah!



I read these words in her diary

An invasion of my girlfriends privacy

I shouldn't have but I'm glad I did

Wonder what does she see in him

A big old tub of jelly with a double chin

He's older then my grandmother



And this Christmas I really desire

Sexual attraction for this holiday star

I've got a plan that you wouldn't believe

But I gotta act fast.It's Christmas Eve

It's Christmas Eve.It's Christmas Eve



Santa's suit is what I would get

And give my girlfriend a night that she'll never forget

And neither will I

Went through my closet and found a red robe

Made a beard out of cotton stuff

a shirt with pillows

And drove to my girls house



I slipped down the chimny

And to my dismay I saw Santa and her in red lingerie

And in between all the moans and groans

I heard her say

O Santa! O Santa!

She Santa I miss you, I love you

I wish you would stay home forever with me

Santa I knew you were coming to town

But tonight your coming with me

Santa, get off of my girlfriend

get off of my girlfriend

get off of my girlfriend