Hipster girl: So check this. I just read the Pitchfork 
review of the new Pavement reissue. 
Stephen Malkumus is a genius, but let's face itÉ he's 
no Conor Oberst. I'm just saying. 
It's not 1994 anymore, duh. Did I show you my new mini 
skirt/leggings combo? 
You know what they say: ugly IS the new hot.

I met her in the thrift shop bumping indie hip-hop
Calculator wrist watch, Shins t-shirt and flip-flops
Queen of the hipster scene, straight out of Vice 
Magazine
Social outcast at 16 but now she lives her BoHo Dream
She came from Omaha to Williamsburg
She loved Karen O and she had heard
That Brooklyn was the hipster mecca
Packed her bags with her friend Rebecca
Said she had a thing for broke dudes in bands
Who lived by Union or by Grand
So we went down to the Bedford Bar
And bought a six dollar PBR

Hipster girl: Ezra. Go down Bedord, take a right on 
Metropolitan, then a right on Union, 
and then you're here. Just text me when you get here 
okay?

CHORUS:
Hipster girl
Cool by the numbers and she rocks my world
Knows all the indie bands you've never heard
She's my hipster girl

She thinks uncool stuff is mad cool, indie culture's 
fad rule
But cool stuff is uncool, right? That's why Friday's 
Jewel night
She reads books no one has read, laughs at jokes no one 
has said
So ironic with her taste, her whole life is cut and 
paste
It's a metrosexual romance, she wears my shirts and I 
wear her pants
We play dodge ball, kid sports are cool
She's my trust fund baby bohemian, her vegan humus 
keeps her thin,
I love my L-Train girl it's true, she always goes down 
on the weekends too

Hipster girl: By the way, that pro-Bush shirt you're 
wearing is making me really uncomfortable,
you may be wearing it ironically, but that doesn't give 
you the license to be obnoxiousÉ you 
look like a hardcore fascist redneck!

CHORUS:
Hipster girl
Cool by the numbers and she rocks my world
Knows all the indie bands you've never heard
She's my hipster girl

BRIDGE:
Donnie Darko makes no sense!
Hipster girl: When did side-pony tails get cool again?
Your fixed-gear bike makes no sense!
Hipster girl: I've been trying to do that dirty-chic 
thing, you know?
Donnie Darko makes no sense!
Hipster girl: I am so BoHo right now
L train girls don't make sense (I don't get it, I don't 
get it)

Hipster girl
Cool by the numbers and she rocks my world
Knows all the indie bands you've never heard
She's my hipster girl

Hipster girl
She's got her latte and some spoken word
Ironic statements on her vintage shirts
She's my hipster girl

Hipster girl: I'll give it to you, Napoleon Dynamite 
was funny, but "Vote for Pedro" t-shirts at
Wal-Mart? What are they thinking. Wal-Mart is evil. 
Their health care is totally inadequate. 
Didn't you see the screening of that Robert Greenwald 
movie at Pete's Candy Store? It was so sad.
What is with all of these hipsters taking over 
Williamsburg?