[Verse 1]

I got an allergy, for every pedigree

So I got myself a robot dog that's Japanese

But yo, he's hard to please

He's always gotta pee

But he never sips a drip

This chip is playin' me

The way it plays ladies, is such a sight to see

He gets more digits than I could inside my wildest dreams

He plays the hoes instead of playin' fetch with me

He sniffs the toes of Tiffany and Stefanie

That brings up Emily, she was my latest squeeze

Robot dog stole that girl right out from under me

Sometimes I wonder why I supply the energy

To my mortal enemy that should be a best friend to me



[Hook]

Robot dog!  He down tequila out of Tommy navel

Robot dog!  He drinks his owner underneath the table

Robot dog!  I'm afraid this foe is fuckin' fatal

I'm about to go pre-natal, end up in a baby cradle

Ro-bot-dog, turn him off, motherfucker!  Say turn him off!

I say ro-bot-dog, turn him off, motherfucker!  Say turn him off!



[Verse 2]

He never pays the rent, he kicks me outta bed

Well I'm the pissed submissive, he's the fuckin' dominance

And it's been really tense

I'm feiging impotence

I got a robot dog and haven't gotten any since

All my pals are fuckin' meloncholy malcontents

From Malcolm In The Middle to Malcolm X

He eats filet mignon, I'm eatin' fuckin' Alphabits

And the motherfucker just left me the consonants

I hold his leash while he gets all the compliments

He gets more attention than a one eyed elephant

He's in the club, I'm in my car out of my element

In a Honda Element, feelin' irrevelant

But it's on like it's Vaughn comma Vince

I wanna be gone like I'm Jon Favreau havin' a fit

He's surrounded by chicks rubbin' their D cup tits

I flip the toilet lid, read a Maxim mag, bust a couple kids



[Hook]



[Beat stops and Robot Dog barks a few times]