I dont claim to ride a bike 

with long black hair to show my might 

I dont follow the latest styles 

they make me throw up bright green bile 

I dont have to shave my head 

or walk around and beg for bread 

I dont have big ears that stick out 

or act like my parents threw me out! 



Dont parade around town 

or shoot up gloo that gets me down 

I dont have lots of holes in my arm 

and have'nt used up all my charms, 

dont go to clubs 'cause I think its cool, 

and hang out with all the fools 

so glad. oh so glad I'm not you 



I dont sit in a highrise office 

and think about how much money I make 

I dont have a greasy toupe or walk around with hair thats fake 

dont have pearls, or cars or furs 

only cowboy boots, no spurs 

no silk sheets apon my bed 

glad I'm not you, I'd rather be dead! 

I have acid wash, but no poodle hair 

thats why I shot you that ugly stare 

no high heels with jeans and socks 

I rather have a bagel, hold the lox 

no tan in the middle of winter 

I'd rather have a ten foot splinter 



*Chorus*